everything does not always end nice and neat with a bow on top. only in a perfect world would that even be considered. but the ending is just as important as the beginning, like a movie.

whenever you’re ending something you always need closure. just like a good weave installation is not complete without a good closure (if you wear closures, of course).

the closure isn’t good just for the relationship that’s ending, but it’s good for your subconscious self. your innerself will continually nag you about something if you haven’t let it go. your innerself will always send you signals to let you know if you’re truly over something; whether it’s your dreams or passing thoughts.

in my opinion, i feel like to truly get closure both parties have to be willing to meet and come to an agreement of where things went wrong and how to fix the problem if you want to move on; however, if that isn’t an option then understand where the other person stands and know that you can’t change the way someone feels or behaves if they’re not willing to do it on their own for the greater cause — the relationship.

but sometimes things don’t work out that way.

sometimes the other person can leave without securing any closure to the weave (LOL). this can leave both parties sad, upset, unsure of themselves, unsure of what went wrong, and confused. my friends, please (i am begging), this is the most immature way to end anything. even when you quit your job you have to send in your letter of resignation… think of it the same way.

when this situation occurs that is when you have to force yourself into having closure. this is when you will experience so many emotions and have so much happening internally. during this “self healing” process is when you learn so much about yourself. this is where you find yourself. you will probably not think too much of it at first, you’ll then probably be carefree, then you’ll be mad, angry, and bitter. after you’ll be sad. you might cry yourself to sleep and listen to all the sad music you can think of putting together in a playlist. but after the storm there is calm. there is a sun. and there is a rainbow.

you cannot rush the self healing process because that’s when you find yourself. that is where you pick up all the pieces, put them back together, and show the world your masterpiece. you have to force yourself to have closure.

the ending of a relationship (whether it be your best friend switched up on you or your boyfriend skipped around town with some other bobble-head girls) tells you much more about that person than their words ever did. someone can say they love you and care for you so much but if their actions never show it then did they ever?

if when ending the relationship the other person can’t be completely honest with you and not just up, wimp out, and leave you then they were never gang, gang, gang down for you. but it’s okay because there was a time that you were living without them and you can go back to that.

but what happens after the self healing process?

you glow, honey. you work on yourself. you get your paper up and you shine. you don’t worry about the opinions of others and you keep the people talking. after the self healing process you make sure you’re good before anyone else. never let yourself get back to that place again.

make sure you know what you expect out of your next friendship or relationship. make sure there are boundaries and understanding because when someone comes along again it won’t be your first rodeo and you have to make sure you won’t go down the same road again. plus once they see your glow they’ll come crawling back.

have you ever experienced no closure? was that a bad experience? how did you handle it? let me know below! don’t forget to share this post with other people that you think may need some encouragement.